[CRISP-TEAM] CRISP TEAM - Proposal Draft 13012015 Call

[Andrei Robachevsky]

Michael - fantastic work and a very quick response!

> I.C.  What registries are involved in providing the service or activity.

I read the document and think that most of the proposed changes improve
the readability of the document.

There are a few changes that I think may change the meaning of what we
agreed upon of slightly confuse things. I attach a document with my
proposed amendments to address these.

Specifically:

- In I.D restored the statement that the IANA Number Registries are
generally accessed via references based on the IANA.ORG domain name.

- In I.D reinstated that the administration of the special-purpose
“IN-ADDR.ARPA” and “IP6.ARPA” DNS zones may also require interaction
with the .ARPA zone registry. This was deleted from the I.C, but I think
the description of dependencies is a better place for this.

- For consistency with the RFP and to avoid confusion with the IANA
Numbering Services Operator, when it refers to all three functions, I
changed the "IANA operator" to "IANA functions operator".

- In III.A I suggested changes to avoid the above confusion when we talk
about the assumption that specific IANA customers (i.e. the numbers
community, the protocol parameters community and the names community)
will have independent arrangements with the IANA functions operator. I
note that this paragraph was originally in the III.A.3, but I agree thie
preamble is a better place, since this assumption also applied to other
elements (e.g. IPR).

Hope this helps,

Regards,

Andrei

Michael Abejuela wrote on 13/01/15 15:52:
> Hello Everyone,
> 
> As always a pleasure speaking with you all on the call this morning
> (evening).  As requested, please find attached a redline and clean
> version of the draft that incorporates Alan’s and my edits which in turn
> was incorporating editorial feedback from the community.  
> 
> Also included in this draft are Paul Wilson’s comments which were both
> editorial and substantive in nature.  If needed after taking a look at
> this version, I can back out Paul’s suggestions if necessary, just will
> need a bit of time.  This is the document from which Bill worked to
> clean up the formatting and do a thorough copy/edit pass, the product of
> which was shared earlier today.
> 
> I understand that there were questions regarding the nature of Bill’s
> updates and whether they were purely editorial and formatting edits or
> if any substantive edits to the text were also incorporated.  I have not
> reviewed Bill’s draft in that level of detail and defer to him to
> confirm this item.
> 
> Please let me know if you have any questions or have any issues with the
> attachments.  If you have any questions on the source of any of the
> changes tracked, please let me know and I would be happy to send the
> source comments/emails.I look forward to your comments and feedback.
> 
> Thanks,
> -Michael
> 
> 
> -- 
> 
> Michael R. Abejuela
> 
> Associate General Counsel
> 
> ARIN
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> 
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